Do you struggle with your name ? Yes, I do.

"Hello, I am ****, I am calling from *******. May I speak to Ms. Hruaii?"


Needless to say I am impressed with his right pronunciation of my name, straight from a written document, without any prior contact or not having him learn 'how to'. This is the first time it happens, I mean, coming from outside my community. He must be either good at pronunciation or has/had a friend with the same name as mine. Either way, I am impressed.

Anyone with a difficult name will know the pain of having a tongue-twister name, especially when it comes to outside our community. I have read the advantage of having a name with easy to pronounce and I agree with it. It is easy to remember and easy to call, even among a circle of friends. There is an underlying power of calling or using names while talking to someone. When people call you by your name, you feel more close with them, instead of having them never call you by your name. I also have a bad habit of not calling by someone's name when I am not comfortable pronouncing it, which makes a little gap (that's how I feel).

I was known by the name 'hruaii' until I joined college in Shillong. Looking back now, during inter, I guess everyone was fined with 'hruaii'. On my first day of college, our teacher, JB ma'am read out our names from the register book. She struggled from the third syllable. She said that it was a very big name and asked me if I was fine to go with just "Vanlal". Well, it became a convenient way to later introduce myself by this name. When some of my new friends still struggle with this, I give them "VL". However, throughout my college days, everyone calls me by the name 'hruaii', except JB ma'am. So, the name 'hruaii' came up with all kinds of distorted spellings and pronunciation, which was rather funny in their own way. During the initial days in the University, our Telugu classmates called all the northeast girls by the name 'Ching', which was the easiest to remember and pronounce.

So, I conclude that if I ever get a child of my own, I'm gonna name him/her a very simple name. :D 

These Scars Remind me of You

I bear scars of medical surgery at different parts of my body. Small or big, they look nasty and disgusting for others to see. I was always worried about having a prominent scar after the latest surgery, that I often asked the doctors who did dressing every alternate days if it was gonna leave a big scar. They always told me not to worry. However, just as I was afraid, due to complications & re-sutures, it developed into a big scar (keloids). At first I was little upset, so I tried my best to get rid of it. I took injections and ointments at high costs but to not much affect. 

I then realized the significance of these scars I bear. They remind me of the life given back to me, the love of the God, His mercy upon me. I see His love. He loves me so much that He gives me these scars; so that I will always remember Him, how much He loves me, His loyalty and His faithfulness. Like these scars never leave me, I know He never leaves me. As much as the scars are embedded on my body, no matter how much I try to get rid of them, the Love of God always lives in me. This is just the body He gives me to take care of, it's not mine, it's His and He can do whatever He wants to with this body. So, I am never to castigate or chide but to take good care of it. I now can take the pride in having these scars, than disgusting them. 

I didn't mind if i had died there. But if i had, His purpose might haven't been fulfilled.

[I wrote this note exactly three years ago. This morning I stumble onto this particular note from my journal. I thought I had posted it here on my blog. I looked up and I saw I hadn't. So, here it is.]

x

Lord I Pray!

Lord I know You always answer my prayers.
You know my heart's desire
If they are against Your will
Please destroy them
And give me the strength I need to go on!
I pray that the people I love be protected,
May they find the truth, happiness and joy in having You.
Give them the courage to overcome the voices of temptations!
You know that all I want for them is they stay happy
Having the life of having You Lord!
I pray that I be the blessings not the burden for them.

            Bless my prayer

                 Amen!!

Just Pondering Over 'PROMISES"

I came across a Friendship Card which said that 'he' would be there with 'her' no matter what came in Life. I'm reflecting on the fact that how life changes with time and those words, consoling words or should I say promising words, became nothing more than just lines of words. It doesn't mean that we didn't mean them when we said or gave those words. Somehow life takes us to the unexplored world which turns us to become different persons. Life goes on, people change, promises become empty words. 

I used to think it's better never to give such words to a friend or a lover because life takes us to a different world and such words could only hurt us, disappoint us, upset us when facing the fact that those words are not kept by the one who gave us. They just don't remember or they don't want to? But now I think it's always best to give the best at a moment, from our heart if we really mean it. When we couldn't keep it, blame it on LIFE ?. Its better to live at present. That's the best remedy for my disappointment over empty promises. 

'Peace in my Troubled Sea'

Many questions run in my head. They don’t stop, but keep running. Why am I still alive, when I could have been dead, many times? I am anxious, how am I to do with my life? Should I stop the fight? Or should I give another shot? The job, I have been studying for, worried me. We all are going to die one day, and on and after that day, what’s all these for? They ain’t going with us. It’s all futile. So, why fight the fight if they mean nothing to eternity? The qualifications, the certificates, even the most precious thing we held dear wouldn’t save us from that day. It feels so pointless. 

All these, because I lean on my own understanding, when Proverbs (3:5-6) tells us not to lean on our own understanding, but to trust in the Lord with all our heart, to acknowledge Him that He will make our path straight. There’s a soft voice telling me that there is a purpose, a reason behind every trouble, behind my life, a reason to live. I just don’t know the reason yet. The same voice tells me to keep going, and to cherish every moment I have been given pricelessly. There are people who beg for their lives to be saved, and there are people who beg to let go of their dear life, who don’t see the point of living another second. Life knocks me off my feet and there I am on my knees, beseeching Him to speak to me. And once again He let me see how He never left my side, through the valley of death, through life’s troubles; He carried me, through it all. He let me feel He is the ‘peace in my troubled sea’. I, once again see the pointlessness in worry about life, which is beyond my control but just to trust in Him.  “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” (Matt 6:33).  

As I Rove Through

I have been visiting villages of Andhra Pradesh and a few North East Karnataka villages for the past months (to be mentioned about 50+ villages). The more I visit the more I come to realize our differences. There are certain things which I admire about their habits and way of living, which I think it can strengthen our unity as brothers and sisters. At the same time there are certain things which bother me too. I don't know it’s only us who face the same situation or others too, there are few points I like to share from my experiences and observations.

1) They love and care for each other. They don't eat alone. They offer whatever they are eating to the person next to them or nearby, if even if they are strangers. 

2) They are kind. They always make time for others who need help. If they are asked, they are always ready and willing to help out and sacrifice their time. 

3) They always want to converse. Ranging from kids to old people, they would initiate conversation. The kids, especially love calling out "aka, aka" (which means 'sister'). They would follow and encircle you even if they don't get response. 

4) They stare a lot. Right in the face. They stop and stare. They would tell the person next to them to have a look at us (this happens especially among the mothers/women).

5) When they offer you food, you have to take them. It’s an honor to eat someone else's food. It’s some kind of appreciation for each other.

6) It’s a taboo to take certain items like 'salt', 'turmeric' and 'tamarind' in and out of the house at night. (I have no clue whether it’s religious or cultural taboo).

Wherever we go we are very much foreigners to them. They have no idea we are from the same country. I assume even after telling them that we are from Mizoram, they would still think that Mizoram is a foreign country. In our very own country , "which country are you from?" is the most frequent question we receive and "english, english" is the only passing comment among the villagers. In town, we are 'Chinese' and in metropolitan cities, we are 'Nepalis'. Face matters a lot. However, it’s about time our own country fellow men knew that India is rich in ethnicity, and has people of different looks. 

(Note: It doesn't mean I am generalizing the villagers of Andhra Pradesh, but I am just sharing my experiences) 

KRAWS PU-A ZUI

BibleReadings:

Mt. 16:24-26; Tin, Isuan a zirtir tehnenah, “Tupawhin mi zui a duh chuan mahni hreawm pawisa lovin, a kraws puin mizui rawh se. Tupawh a nun humhim duh apiangin a chan anga; tupawh keimah avangaa nun chan apiangin a humhim ang. Miin khawvel a pumin nei sela, a nun chan sisela, a tan engnge saw tang?”

Mt. 10:38; Tupawh a kraws pua mi zuilo chu, ka mi ni tlak a ni lo.

Lk. 14:27; Tupawh mahni kraws pua mizui lo apiang chu ka zirtir a ni thei lo vang.

Lk. 9:23; Tin, amah vekin, mi zawngzawng hnenah, “Tupawhin mi zui a duh chuan mahni hreawm pawisa lovin, ni tin akraws puin mi zui rawh se.

Bible-a kan hmuh ang khan Isua kanzui loh chuan kan nun kan chan dawn a ni a. Isua zui kan duh chuan Kraws putangai a ni. Kraws pu lo chuan Ami nitlak kan ni lo Isuan a tit lat mai.

1. Kraws in a Entir: Thihna. Isua kha Golgotha a krawspu-a a kal khan, tumahin kraws kha ritphur chhinchhiahna (symbolic of burden) ahan ngai lo. 1^st century hunlai khan kraws chuan thil pakhat chiah akawk chu chu ‘thihna’ a ni. A tlawm thei ang ber leh na ber, mihring tuar theihtawp a na thihna, thih dan rapthlak ber ah an ngai a ni.

2. Kraws Pu Awmzia: Tunlai khawvelah chuan kraws pu kanhrilhfiah dan a lo dang ta. Thil hreawm, keimahni tih dikloh leh thuawih lohavanga harsatna, lungngaihna leh manganna kan chunga thleng te, taksa chaklohhrim hrim te, mahni inkhawngaihna (self pity) kan tih ang te, kan nuna kanritphurh te hi kraws pu ang ten kan hrilhfiah a. A dik lo a ni.

Kan sawi tawhangin Isua hunlai khan kraws chuanThihna rapthlak ber a entir a. A chhanchu Rom ho khan misual vawrtawp(convicted criminals) ho kha an mahni khenbehna tur an mahni kraws teuh an puttir thin a ni. An tan chuan ‘kraws put’ awmzia chu an thihna tur hmanrua put a,chutah kalkawngah mi nuihsawh leh endawng an kaltlang a tul thin a ni.

Chuvang chuan“I kraws puin mi zui rawh” Isuan a tih khan a tum tak chu thih leh mi teendawng pawh huam a Amah zui a ni (Lk 9:23). Chutichuan kraws pu awmzia chu‘mahni in that, mahni inphat, mahni in thiat’ (dying to self) tihna a ni. (a) Kraws pute chuan thihna lam an pan thina, an thi thin ang hian nunhlui chu thihsan tur kan ni. (b) Inpumpekna tawp akohna a ni.

3. Krista, Kan Entawn Tur: Isua hnungzuia kraws pu tur chuanAmah Isua atanga inzir kan ngai a. Amah kan entawn a ngai a ni.

(a) A in peknavawrtawp

(b) Tuarnakaltlanga thuawihna sang ber

(c) Kraws-a Athihna chuan chhandamana min pe a. A awmzia chu Chhandamna chu Tuarna-aTihfamkim a ni. Chhandam kan nih tawh chuan Isua anga tuarna kan kaltlang angai a ni.

4. Zuitu Nunkawng: (a) Kawng awlsam a ni lo:- (i)Kalsan, chan neih a ngai (ii) Mahni inphat a ngai (iii) Hmun reh, hmun khawhara ni. Kraws ah khan Isuan, “Ka pa, Ka Pathian engahnge mi kalsa” a ti. (iv)Engkim huam a ngai.

(b) Nunna Veka pe a, hmalam chauh pana kalna a ni.: kraws a A thihna chuan Nuna a hringa,min hmangaih avanga thi a nih avangin a Hmangaihna kan chhan let ve nan amahkan zui a ngai a ni. Amah zui tur chuan kraws put a ngai.

5. A nih leh:

(a) Eng hunah nge kan zui ang? – Nitin, englaipawhin. Lk. 9:23 “mahni hreawm pawisa lovinnitin a kraws puin mi zui rawh se” a ti a ni. Kan nuam tih zawng leh duh zawngte kalsan a tul thin ang. Entirnan, thianza hova thil tih nuam ka ti a ni theiamaherawh chu Kohhran emaw in Pathian hminga inpawl hona a neih lai ang techuan chung kan hun chu kan sacrifice vet e angai ang. Tunlai ah games khelh tekan uarin, facebook hmang uar em ema, hla zir ai a lo facebook te, thawhvelehatanga mahni devotion theihnghlih tak a facebook te games khelh te Kraws putnen chuan a rem lo a ni.

(b) Khawi hmunah nge kan zui ang? – khawihmunah pawh. Hmun ral ti, hmunkhawhar, zahthlak kantihna hmunah te. Kristian Vanram Kawngzawh-a Thlemsama ang mai a thlem kan sama, Lungngaihna Chirhdup kan kal kai theihloh chuan awmzia a awm dawn lo a ni.Kristiana anga Chhungte leh thenrual te pawhin an koh let theih loh, harsatnachi hrang hrang leh thlemna chitinreng pawh kal tlang zel a tul a ni.

(c) Engtinge kan zui ang? - Isua khan a hniam lam panin Vanhmun nuam atanga hmun hreawm ber ‘Luruh hmun’ thlengin ama mihrinna khengbetina Pa thu a zawm angin, keinipawhin a hniam lam panin mahni lam thiat zelin kanzui ang. Inngaitlawm te, tlawm zawka tan te a ngai thin. Entirnan, hmun harsakan tihna-ah te kohna hria chuan khawihmun kilkhawr leh hreawm pawh nise.Sacrifice tur tam tak a awm ang. Nula tlangval inngaihzawnna kawngah pawh inhmangaih te tan chuan engpawh in huam ang hian Isua i hmangaih chuan Atanengpawh i huam a angai ang.

(d) Khawi Hmun Thlenga Zui Tur Nge? – A tawp rat thlengin. Thih thlengin. A tawpa kan chan turnen chuan kan kraws put chu tekhin rual a ni lo a ni. Thupuan 2:10-ah kan hmuhkha “Thih thlengin rinawmin lo awm rawh, tichuan nunna lallukhum ka pe ang che.”Hun hreawm leh khirh kan kal lai pawhin kan lawmman dawn tur enrana kal hramhram a ngai a ni.

Harsatna kan tawh lem loh lai, kannun a kal tluan lai chuan Isua zui chu thil har a ni pawhin a lang lo.Amaherawhchu, Amaha kan inpek tak tak leh tak tak loh chu dinhmun khrih-ah alang chhuak thin a ni lawm ni. Nimahsela, chung hunah pawh chuan Thlamuang takaawm turin mamah zuitu te chu min ti. Isua khan hun harsa leh khirh Amah zuituten an paltlang a ngai tih a hre lawk a thlamuan thu min hnutchhiah a nih kha. “Keiinkhawvel ka ngam ta” Isuan a ti (Joh 16:33).

(P.S. Ka sermon sawi hmasak ber a nia chuvang chuan ka post ve duh hrim hrim)